


She's Running to Stand Still

by Betrothed_to_Angelo



Category: New Material
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-06
Updated: 2019-02-06
Packaged: 2019-10-23 07:56:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17679476
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Betrothed_to_Angelo/pseuds/Betrothed_to_Angelo





	She's Running to Stand Still

I don’t know what to say. I try to think of something but nothing comes. There is nothing on my mind but this song: _Sweet the sin, bitter the taste in my mouth…_ This must be the shock. How does it go? I can only hear the rain falling. How did I get here? How did this happen? All was going so fine and now I lost my best friend. Best friend? I barely knew her. All this people around have known her way longer. I’ve known her for less than a year. And some how she’s become my best friend. We talked on the phone almost every week, I don’t know. We met every month. I knew she was down, I didn’t know she was depressed. I, Mrs. Depression-In-Person, couldn’t see the signs. But were there any? Did she really kill herself? _I see seven towers, but I only see one way out._ Didn’t I talk to her enough… I wish I could call her now and say how much she meant to me.

The silence is deafening. No one speaks, no choruses, no sermons. But I feel like singing: _You gotta cry without weeping, talk without speaking, scream without raising your voice._ That is not how she would want it. Somebody sobs. Is that her mother? I never met her mom. I’ve seen her on pictures from  the wedding, but I’ve never met any one of her family. Not even her husband. Will he take her home? Or her mom perhaps? She wanted to be cremated and flown back home. By no chance be left in Europe. We talked about this. Was that a sign? No. She was fine. She told me how fine she was, working, having fun. Although, she could have been just pretending to be fine. Many times I didn’t tell her every thing either. Best friends, huh? _You know I took the poison, from the poison stream, then I floated out of here…_ She told me how much I have helped her in the last year.

Oh, what should I say? Nothing comes to my head, except that damn song: _Singing, Ah la la la de day Ah la la la de day ._ Maybe I should start singing at the top of my lungs. That’s a good song. She would have sure liked it. “Make things more interesting,” she would say. That’s how she was: the greatest fan of absurdity.

 

The silent was broken by the rolling of the coffin. People start talking, but I can’t understand. The rain has stopped but I can hear the flames burning. _“She is ragin', She is ragin'_ ... Nooo, she didn’t kill herself. It was an accident. Just a terrible accident. It’s over. Goodbye, my friend. I hope I have really helped you in the last year. See you when I see you… _She's running to stand still_.


End file.
